As I mentioned previously, the initial physical manifestation of my pain and rage resulted in me beating the guitar so violently that I was breaking the thickest strings on the guitar. The speed of my strikes was already quite fast, but as I began to temper the force of the strikes, the speed increased even more. I split the expressive energy into force and speed, varying how much energy went into each, in order to properly express the energy. I began to feel a direct correlation between the intensity with which I played and the pain and rage that was exploding outwards from within me. The basic emotional drive had a direct expressive result. The resulting effect of this was a gut-level feeling of a particular state of being. That state of being was not the result of a single experience, but rather the combined effect of many experiences that left a specific feeling in the gut as to what one's reality actually was. That gut-level feeling is the base self from which one expresses them-self in the form of expression that we might call a song.
Before delving into the lyrical construct, I would like to point out a few things. Every aspect of the song should be a derivative of the base self from which the expression comes. I found that most commonly, I would compose the entire framework for the guitar part before writing the lyrics. I always knew what the feeling was that I was trying to express, but with the guitar part intact, I would then often hum my feelings as I play, until the words begin to come to me. I found that the lyrics followed with minimal effort. The flow of emotional energy brings them into focused clarity, in the form of words that reflect the state of being that is expressed in the song. The emotional content forcing its way out of me was the brute force merging that resulted in a specific perspective and a specific state of being from which to express it. I can actually "feel" the emotions in the guitar work. That gives clarity to the lyrical expression that will follow and is invaluable in creating lyrics that portray those emotional states genuinely. It is important to point out here that emotions can be expressed in many ways, so there is no "correct" way to express them. I actually have several version of each song recorded that correctly portray the emotional content of the song, but they sound very different. This is because each is portrayed from a different, specific "self", state of BEing, and perspective. So, there is choice in which "self", state of BEing, and perspective, you wish to convey the emotional content from in your song. The choices that you make while expressing yourself on the guitar will always be different each time that you play the song (provided that you are playing sincerely each time). However, you will stay close to a relative few when performing in front of others. And I may find certain forms of satisfaction when playing a song one way, and not necessarily ever play it that way for others. I also found that my voice was the best accompaniment to my guitar. It is far more flexible to use than another instrument, and it is the perfect counter-balance for the guitar. With it, I can weave the two flows of expression together into a complete expression of BEing.
As I mentioned previously, the state of being representing the base perspective from which the song is performed, is not the result of a single experience, but rather the combined effect of many experiences. On the guitar, this comes out naturally. When writing the lyrics, I found that I had to find a way to compact all of the experiences and sense of "selves" in a way that would give a full sense of the state of being I was expressing. This is where literacy comes in. I would advise you to increase your vocabulary to aid in writing lyrics. It is not simply a matter of antonyms, synonyms, and rhymes. I expanded my vocabulary using books and observations. As I expanded my vocabulary, I observed that many new words provide a more detailed clarification of an idea, than how I used to think. These more detailed forms of expression assisted in extending the complexity and clarification of my critical thinking, and also in the compaction of experiences that I was constructing to express myself as a single, resulting state of BEing. I still have the colloquialisms that I am familiar with to use. But I also have more flexible options for my forms of expression. This lyrical "compaction" of experiences could be viewed as being something like the sound in someone's voice that expresses multiple things in a single sound. For example, a voice that expresses varying degrees of love, pain and fear in a single syllable due to the manner in which it is expressed. When constructing the lyrics of a song, which I base on the guitar work that generates the deep emotional content, I will choose wording that expresses the various "selves" that are being expressed in that particular phrase of the song. The way that the lyrics are expressed are as equally important as the words chosen. I cannot stress this enough. Do not sing for the sake of a sound. You might impress yourself with a vocal that sounds really cool. Accept it and move on. Do not try to sustain it or it will stop you from achieving what you want to be. You have many more cool sounding vocals that you will express when it is natural to do so. You achieve this by focusing on sincerely expressing your emotional flow with both your voice, and your guitar. When I perform, I am in each of those composite moments of the song again and feel the same gut-level reality. My expression of the lyrics is genuine and reflects the emotions in a very sincere way.
Personally, I disdain the use of choruses in lyrics that are exactly the same each time around. To me, there is no life in repeated lyrics. I prefer to modify each iteration to express the increasing emotional strain, or the passage of time in a sequence of events, or the use of anything that expresses a different reality from the last iteration.
As mentioned previously, I do not think in terms of musical notation. That is to say that I do not think in terms of notes, keys, scales, etc. and the constructs are not based on these notational representations of playing the guitar. To do so would be to compose for the sake of music theory itself, which is NOT self-expressive. I keep my basic constructs simple because what I do with them is very complex. My strikes upon the strings are dependent on the flow of energy. As a song progresses, the energy builds. This can result in sweeping motions across the strings of the guitar. These can be reminiscent of the sign of infinity (like the digit "8" laid over on its side), or like a whip. These examples are intended only to give you a picture in your mind as to what a motion might look like. I do not recommend that you try to make your guitar sound like a whip. That is not self-expression. It falls more in line with "playing for the sake of a sound". Besides, it is too simple and childish. What I am trying to convey to you is that once you start moving energy through your guitar, you will be able to move it in a whipping motion across the strings. Plucking a sound and moving energy are very different things. The energy can be shaped and moved in infinite ways. Take one simple pattern, like the sign of infinity that I mention earlier. It is not utilized in only the two dimensions that you might associate with striking the strings. It is more like a "superposition" that the pattern exists in, where all possible strikes are laid out side-by-side so to speak, in any given dimension. In addition to this, I move my point of contact with the strings up and down the fret-board, varying the position in that pattern to express myself. It could be from initiating a striking pattern from a position more toward one end of the pattern than the other, or it could be that the center point is shifted, modifying the size of the sideways teardrop loops that make up the sign of infinity, so that one is smaller and the other larger. I must also clarify that my striking hand is often fluttering very fast as I move across the strings. As always, I address this only to make you aware of the mechanics of the process. You should not be thinking about these things when you are trying to play. You should instead, focus on flowing the energy through your guitar and moving with it. I share my experiences with you to provide an example of how to approach the process. You will develop your own process that is perfect for you.
Now I am going to take this to the next level. Imagine that sideways figure "8" superimposed onto your guitar neck. See the center point of the pattern. See the teardrop loop expanding out from the center point to the top of the neck and another expanding out to the bottom end of the strings on the guitar. Now lift the pattern from the fret-board into a 3-dimensional structure so that the teardrop loops become 3-dimensional cones. Visualize the size of the cones getting either shorter and wider, or longer and thinner as you move the centerpoint above and along the strings, keeping them equal in volume as you move. The utility of this perception will become apparent when you learn to convert extra-dimensional energy into physical energy that you can use to produce sound-waves, and hence, music to express your BEing.
You exercise control over the flow of energy through the guitar by tying it to the flow of emotion that defines what it is to be you in the circumstances of the expression. You will eventually "see" the energy as you pull it into the guitar. You will develop patterns that you can use to "whip up" the energy and then shoot it out across this continuum with powerful effect. From your extra-dimensional perspective, you "see" the flow of energy that comprises the states of BEing that are you from the perspective of the song. You are experiencing this flow as an expression of self that you can see as the patterns of energy that you move through the guitar. Do not try to control the specific motions of the striking/strumming hand. Instead, merely channel it by confining the flow when applying the release of extra energy. Just keep the fluttering going as you push the energy into the guitar, driving the striking/strumming hand into the strings with measured force appropriate for the varying levels of energy necessary to accurately express your self. When driving very intense and controlled energy patterns into your guitar, your striking/strumming hand may at times, tumble along the strings the way that a large wave tumbles you along the sand when it crashes on you at the beach. Go with it. It is being driven by the energy that you are forcing into the guitar. The result is an entirely new level of sound being created. The more that you experiment with this process, the greater the effect and the wider the range of sounds you will create. This is a key process of developing your "style".
Initially, you should start out running. That is to say, you get your striking hand fluttering, and move across the strings following a simple, basic pattern. But you don't just start out trying to play with nothing to express. As mention in other sections of this work, you must be "driven" to express yourself. If your motivation is to hurry and write a new song with what you can glean from this material, then the song will not truly express you, because rather than sincere communication, you seek applause. There must be a necessary communication that must be made, or an emotional overload that demands a reaction from you. There must be something driving you to sincerely express your self. Your focus should be the sound that feels like the state of BEing that you are expressing in your song. So make every sound an expression of self and of your reality. The more that you do this, the greater the control and dexterity you will have as a result. I must re-iterate here that this should NOT be viewed as "practice". "Practice" would infer being a "student" which is equivalent to being "on the path". This distinction in mindset is important. You must DECIDE to BE, rather than to be "on the path". Expressing your self on the guitar is a state of BEing, not a state of wanting to be or practicing to be. Every time you play is a performance whether there is an audience or not. An audience is not required to "BE".
The practices listed above are elements of my personal expression of self. They are not intended to be "copied" by another. They are explained here only to serve as an example of the nature of what you are pursuing when learning to express your self. Each individual must find their own practices that express their unique selves. There is infinite unclaimed territory available for your own unique forms of self-expression that are every bit as impressive as anyone else's. To copy me is the same as copying any other guitar player. You would be doing yourself a great dis-service and depriving yourself of the ability to express your unique self, which is what this material is all about. That being said, all notes and all patterns belong to everyone. That is, when you express your true unique self in every note and every phrase, it is YOU. But if your starting point (or any point) is based on a sound you heard someone play or a pattern that someone made popular, then it is false from the start. Regardless of how well you lie to yourself about it, it is NOT an expression of self. You must be honest with yourself above all. Only by being completely honest with yourself, can you really shine. You will begin to see that there is infinite unique ground to be staked out for your own self-expression. You don't need to copy anyone else. In fact, you are already the best and only person that can express You. It is so much more satisfying to "BE" than to wannabe.
Being familiar with Quantum Physics, I made a direct connection early on, between BEing, self-expression, and the Many Worlds interpretation of Quantum Physics. My ability to "see" and "BE" extra-dimensionally expanded more and more. In fact, now it is so much a part of me and my everyday existence that it is no longer a "new frontier" to me. It is simply, as it is.
Originally, rock was defined by individuals who expressed themselves genuinely. There was a cool about them in that they were themselves regardless of how anyone else would want to characterize them. Somewhere along the line, that got lost. Commercialism tried to sum up that type of persona with imagery. Then every wannabe based their music persona on the imagery that they were being sold as being cool. Many band pics still follow the same posing or hard looks that they think are supposed to be cool, or are trying to live up to the loner, misunderstood artist stereo-type that they were sold as being cool. Personally, I consider it painfully lame. Real cool comes from individuals who are focused on BEing what they are, not imagery. They accept that their music and their selves are one, that they live it always, unfettered by opinions of others, because they know that only they can express what they have inside.
The same feeling can be expressed as a true representation of many of your "selves", but each "self" expresses it sincerely from its own unique perspective. That means from the selves that would be more expressive in a hard rock way, to the selves that are so depressed that they can barely function, the same feeling can be expressed. From the most exciting to the dullest, and in every state of being in-between, one must acknowledge that one is every variation of one's self, and still maintain a confident, unfettered continuum of being. Acknowledging this and BEing in every self, one finds that the energy of BEing can be utilized by all of the selves to construct a continuum of self to express themselves. This provides continuity of the self being expressed.
Consider the composure one must exercise in order to express the emotional content of a song. Think of it a matter of self-control. Stay focused on the state of being driving the song. But be mindful that it is a dynamic process. It is an interaction with the state of being expressing the emotional state of a specific collection of your life's moments, but it is also interacting with your current physiology, state of being, energy level, etc.. From the linear perspective that you are familiar with, it would appear to be a joining of past moments with the present. But try to understand that these moments, all moments of your being, exist simultaneously, and you are in multiple moments simultaneously. This is the direct extra-dimensional connection that allows you to channel your vast energy between them. In your ultimate state of BEing, you are in a "superposition" wherein you are in all moments of all possible realities of your "self", in all eventualities, conceivable and inconceivable, simultaneously and eternally.
When playing your song, you are moving across your "selves" which may likely include those spread out over realities beyond the ones in the continuum of your life. It is important to stay aloft and not get too close to any particular "self", for the deeper you focus or the closer you get to any of them, the stronger the pull they have on you. Think of them like a gravity well near a black hole. If you get too close, you can't break free and you will get sucked into that particular state of being and drop out of the flow that previously held you aloft. The local manifestation of this when playing your song is that you will lose focus, falter and suddenly lose your sense of self-expression. I speak from experience.
Each time that you play a song, it is a unique expression of self. The fact that you are playing the song is a choice that you fill your life with the song, and at the same time, fill the song with your life. The more time that you spend expressing the song, pouring your Self into it, the more a part of you it becomes, and the more a part of it, you become. You become the music and the music becomes you. Each unique expression of self that you radiate each time that you play the song, is a single dimension of your self and of the song. Yes, the songs are multi-dimensional, just as you are. Each of these expressions is a continuum or "thread" that comes together with your other continuums to weave a form that is your extra-dimensional self. And part of that extra-dimensional self is the song. You will also find that when you are not performing, you carry the song in you because it is part of you. This multi-dimensional aspect of your self can be sensed by those who cannot normally "see" in an extra-dimensional way, though they will not know what it is that they are perceiving. When you construct and perform enough songs to represent your existence in this continuum that you call life, You are not just a walking, talking story of your self, you are living the music as it lives in you.
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